When we are angry or upset, our body, especially our hearts, react much differently than when we have good and positive feelings about a person.
Here is a technique that can help you open your heart, even toward a verbal adversary. Try to imagine that person as a sweet and innocent baby. Try to find one good point about him and focus on that thought. If you can't find at least one good thing about him, you haven't looked hard enough.
Opening up your heart towards the adversary may often result in diffusing his hostility and anger. Don't hesitate to make the first move—whether you smile at him, put out your hand for a friendly handshake, or make a kind remark. If the situation is befitting, you can even offer a short and warm “hello” kiss. You'll get a lot of satisfaction from taking him off-guard.
Your loving and heartfelt gestures often diffuse others' anger and hostility towards you. So don't be surprised if you see a 180-degree turn in their behavior. Watch them metamorphose from mean to nice in less than 10 seconds.
Congratulations, you have just won the first battle in the verbal war!
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