- Is your posture stiff and rigid?
- Is your posture too relaxed or loose?
- Is your back hunched over?
- Do you rock back and forth or are you unable to stand still?
- Do you stand on one leg instead of two?
The next two questions cannot be answered by observing yourself in the mirror or on video. Therefore, think
back to social or business situations you have been involved in when answering them.
back to social or business situations you have been involved in when answering them.
- Do people move away from you when you speak to them because you stand too close?
- Do people move closer to you because you sit or stand so far away?
If you answered “yes” to any of these questions, you need all the help you can get.
Those with stiff and rigid postures are perceived as being uptight and inflexible, cold and distant—not warm and inviting. These people tend to alienate others, who find them unapproachable and difficult to communicate with.
While it is great to have a relaxed and inviting stance that indicates self-confidence, a posture that is too loose or over-relaxed is perceived as being sloppy and unconfident. It is alienating—who wants to be around a slob who is overly comfortable around you, even if they just met you?
Rocking back and forth is perceived as impatience or anxiousness to leave the scene. It makes others uncomfortable because your constant movements often contribute to their loss of focus and concentration.
Thus, they find it very difficult to talk to you. Other, more compassionate individuals are also uncomfortable and may lose their train of thought around you as they empathize with your anxious need to go to the bathroom or get a drink. Unless you are a flamingo living in Miami or you are physically challenged and posses only one leg, standing on one leg is highly distracting. You are perceived as being in pain from an injured leg. Instead of thinking about the conversation you are engaged in, the other person is wondering what happened to your leg. People perceive you as immature, because children usually present this stance when talking to others, especially when they are uncomfortable around that person. Others may also perceive you as being not attuned to the present situation, or too casual. Having others perceive you in this manner does not elicit trust and confidence in you.
Standing too close to someone, especially if there is not a mutual love connection, makes people uncomfortable for a number of reasons. First, they may become conscious of their possible bad breath or be repelled by your breath or body odor. Secondly, they may shrink back because they don’t want you to get the impression that they are interested in you. They may perceive you as having a lot of nerve or “chutzpah” as you dare to invade their precious space. Remember that in some cultures people stand closer to one another than is comfortable for
Westerners. If someone stands too far away they are perceived as not liking you or being arrogant, snobby, or feeling as though they are better than you. Even if you have a visual problem and can see people clearly only from a distance, no one cares. They still perceive you in a bad light, so move closer!
Those with stiff and rigid postures are perceived as being uptight and inflexible, cold and distant—not warm and inviting. These people tend to alienate others, who find them unapproachable and difficult to communicate with.
While it is great to have a relaxed and inviting stance that indicates self-confidence, a posture that is too loose or over-relaxed is perceived as being sloppy and unconfident. It is alienating—who wants to be around a slob who is overly comfortable around you, even if they just met you?
Rocking back and forth is perceived as impatience or anxiousness to leave the scene. It makes others uncomfortable because your constant movements often contribute to their loss of focus and concentration.
Thus, they find it very difficult to talk to you. Other, more compassionate individuals are also uncomfortable and may lose their train of thought around you as they empathize with your anxious need to go to the bathroom or get a drink. Unless you are a flamingo living in Miami or you are physically challenged and posses only one leg, standing on one leg is highly distracting. You are perceived as being in pain from an injured leg. Instead of thinking about the conversation you are engaged in, the other person is wondering what happened to your leg. People perceive you as immature, because children usually present this stance when talking to others, especially when they are uncomfortable around that person. Others may also perceive you as being not attuned to the present situation, or too casual. Having others perceive you in this manner does not elicit trust and confidence in you.
Standing too close to someone, especially if there is not a mutual love connection, makes people uncomfortable for a number of reasons. First, they may become conscious of their possible bad breath or be repelled by your breath or body odor. Secondly, they may shrink back because they don’t want you to get the impression that they are interested in you. They may perceive you as having a lot of nerve or “chutzpah” as you dare to invade their precious space. Remember that in some cultures people stand closer to one another than is comfortable for
Westerners. If someone stands too far away they are perceived as not liking you or being arrogant, snobby, or feeling as though they are better than you. Even if you have a visual problem and can see people clearly only from a distance, no one cares. They still perceive you in a bad light, so move closer!
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