Noooooo! Don't Do It!

Then one evening, things are quiet. The phone isn't ringing and you have no plans. After partying like mad to celebrate your newfound freedom, you are beginning to come back down to earth as you realize that the party's over. Now you have to start a new life with new people who are not verbally toxic.
It's tough. You think, “How am I going to meet someone to start a new verbally healthy relationship?” “Where do I go?” “What do I do?” “Oh no!,” you think to yourself, “What if they don't find me attractive? What if they don't like me? What if I am alone? What if I never find a relationship again? What if nobody wants to sleep with me? What if everyone who meets me rejects me? What will happen to me? What if I get so depressed because of all of this and don't want to go on living? What if I decide to kill myself?”
Now that you have worked yourself over mentally and looked at your newfound freedom as a scary and horrific nightmare, instead of an exciting and thrilling adventure, you are paralyzed with fear! You feel so naked, so exposed, so vulnerable—as though you are so completely naked that you aren't even wearing your skin, let alone your clothes!
So, what does your first instinct tell you? Why, of course, reach for the phone and call that familiar person—your verbal abuser. It's safe. He might be abusive, you reason to yourself, but at least he was yours. He'll make it all better! You won't be feeling as naked and insecure if you go back with him, you think. So, you reach for the phone to call the “Him.” Just when we all thought you were doing so well, you are now back for more. The saga continues, and now we definitely don't want to hear about it. We're sick of hearing about the abuser, and by now we're sick of you.

You Finally Got the Message!

Some people, usually ones who are a bit masochistic due to self-worth issues, take a much longer time to get the message. Those who have really worked on themselves psychologically to rid themselves of any mental demons take less time to see the light. They kick the verbal vulture to the curb. After three strikes maximum, they are history!
You finally get it! Yeah! After trying each and every way to rationalize and convince yourself of ways it could work out, you now realize that there is no hope. You simply can't have this person destroying your identity and your life. You have resigned yourself to the fact that you cannot fool yourself any longer.
Now you are so excited—free at last. You feel as though a ton has been lifted from your shoulders. You can't believe how good you feel. You are smiling all the time. People tell you how great you look. You feel that you have a new lease on life. People actually like being around you now, because you're not always depressed and talking their ear off about your troubles. You are invited to more places and you are having more fun than ever.
You are open to new things. You even get a new hairstyle, and shed the 10 pounds you gained in the toxic relationship, which literally “weighed you down!” You look great! You feel great! Everyone around you now is great! Life is great!